“Because he’s never said he’s sorry”. . . “She kept the ring my grandma wanted me to have” . . . “He laughed at how I cringed at his cheap insult.”
All these—and more—as reasons that we can’t—or won’t—forgive. We acidly rehearse the story of our injury, deepening divides and festering in feuds. Soon we come to like the bitter taste of bile, for anger feels powerful, and power is what we want.
But Jesus offers us another way—a path of grace that doesn’t measure wounds and grievances. “Love your enemies,” He urges. “Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you” (Luke 6:27-28).
Such kindness seems impossible until—unless—we grasp how greatly we have been forgiven. Our graciousness is still the greatest sign that we have understood our real state, for “a person who is forgiven little shows only little love” (Luke 7:47).
If you never need forgiveness, then stay as hot and angry as you dare. But if your story calls for grace, accept the Father’s timely gift.
And stay in it.
—Bill Knott